As tough as it may be, planning some type of memorial service for your pet and paying tribute to the life of your furry, feathered, or scaled family member is a meaningful way to outwardly grieve. 

It’s not uncommon for bereaved pet parents to feel a lot of complicated emotions and questions around having a service. Do I want to invite people? Will people want to come? Will they be judgemental? What if it’s not something I can do in the early days or weeks of grief? Is it still ok to do something much later? 

There truly are no rules when it comes to a memorial service. Do what feels right to you. Maybe you’re reading this on day one of grief and think you might want to plan something someday, but can’t right now. Or maybe it’s approaching the one year anniversary and you wonder if it’s been too long and you’ve missed the proverbial window. 

I hope you can remember this one thing: There are no rules. Let your heart tell you when it’s time and lead you to planning the details. Everything will fall into place.

The Details of Planning a Memorial Service For Your Pet

Take time to give some thought and consideration to how you might envision your service. This’ll help it start to take shape, and ultimately be a tool for fine tuning the details when you’re ready. 

Some things to think about —

• Will the service be private, just you or you and a close friend or family member(s), or will you invite others who knew and loved your fur, feathered, or scaled loved one
• Is there a meaningful date or time of year for you
• Is there a particular location that would feel intentional or significant
• Would you want to write a personal eulogy or read special passages aloud
• What are some meaningful remembrance ideas to honor your pet
• Maybe you don’t want to do anything in person and keep it all to a written memorial shared with others

Once you begin thinking through some of the important elements, start writing them down to organize your thoughts. Seeing the details taking shape, you may find yourself looking forward to this outward expression of remembrance.

Give yourself as much grace and patience as needed while you find what feels right to you. Honoring such a special love is a beautiful experience. Grief can be so isolating; one benefit of having a memorial is sharing your love and loss with others, which can open a window on the path to healing. 

Creating a Online Memorial

Whether it be in addition to a service, or as the way you decide to honor your precious pet and share with others, an online memorial is a lovely choice.

The one that I can personally recommend is Lap of Love’s Memorial Page. If you’re curious about other platforms, a Google search for ‘pet loss memorial sites’ will assuredly lead to others as well. Three important considerations when finding the right memorial site:

• Does the site allow you to share a personal link to your memorial that other’s can visit?
• Can you add photos to personalize your tribute?
• Will the memorial be permanently hosted on the site?
• Is it free?

Whichever option you choose, or if you decide to do both, creating a space to honor your pet will be a big step on the healing journey. Give yourself credit and give yourself rest. Planning something that evokes a lot of emotion can be just as exhausting as it is meaningful.